How Military Spouses Can Prepare Financially Before Separation

Separation is never easy — emotionally, practically, or financially. For military spouses, it comes with unique challenges: frequent moves, uneven employment opportunities, shared military benefits, and the complexities of military pay and retirement.

Whether you’re just beginning to consider a separation or already living apart, getting financially organized early can make a world of difference in protecting your future stability.

Here’s how to start preparing — step by step.

1. Understand What Income You Rely On

Start by identifying all sources of household income. For many military families, this includes:

• Base pay

• Basic Allowance for Housing (BAH)

• Basic Allowance for Subsistence (BAS)

• Special or incentive pays (like deployment or sea pay)

• Civilian employment income

If your spouse is active duty, remember that some of these benefits may be tied to marital status and dependent status. Once you separate, your spouse may no longer receive “with dependent” BAH. Planning for that change now will help you budget realistically.

2. Gather and Organize Financial Documents

Before separation, collect copies of everything that shows your financial picture. This includes:

• LES (Leave and Earnings Statements)

• Tax returns (at least the last two years)

• Bank and credit card statements

• Retirement account summaries (TSP, pensions, etc.)

• Mortgage, car loan, and debt information

• Insurance policies

Having these documents in one place makes it easier to determine what’s marital property and to ensure nothing is overlooked later in equitable distribution.

3. Build a Budget for Independent Living

Once you separate, your household income and expenses will change. Create a realistic monthly budget based on your anticipated post-separation situation, not your current combined income.

Include:

• Rent or mortgage payments (based on your new living arrangement)

• Childcare or daycare costs

• Utilities, groceries, gas, and phone/internet

• Car insurance and maintenance

• Health coverage costs (especially if you’ll need to transition off TRICARE)

Seeing these numbers in black and white helps you determine what kind of financial support you’ll need and can inform discussions about Post-Separation Support (PSS) or alimony.

4. Check Credit and Separate Accounts Wisely

If most financial accounts are joint, consider the following steps:

• Check your credit report for joint accounts or debts you may not be aware of.

• Open your own bank account and begin directing your income (if applicable) into it.

• Be cautious about closing joint accounts until advised by an attorney — this can impact your spouse’s credit and cause unnecessary conflict.

It’s also smart to keep track of marital funds used after separation, since those transactions may be reviewed in property division.

5. Understand Military Benefits and Entitlements

Military benefits can be a source of confusion — and potential financial security — during separation. It’s important to understand:

• The 10/10 rule for dividing military retirement pay (10 years of marriage overlapping 10 years of service).

• The Survivor Benefit Plan (SBP) and whether you may be entitled to coverage.

• TRICARE eligibility after divorce (usually ends unless you meet the 20/20/20 rule).

• Transitional compensation or potential spousal support through the military.

Knowing where you stand helps prevent surprises later.

6. Get Legal Advice Before You Separate

Many spouses are surprised to learn that financial decisions made before separation — such as moving out, canceling insurance, or transferring funds — can have legal consequences.

Talking with a family law attorney familiar with military divorce and North Carolina law can help you:

• Protect your access to marital assets

• Avoid unintentional financial misconduct

• Plan strategically for child and spousal support

• Ensure compliance with state and federal regulations

Even a one-hour consultation can give you clarity and a roadmap before major changes occur.

Final Thoughts

Preparing financially before separation isn’t about being adversarial — it’s about being informed and secure. Military life already requires resilience and adaptability; this is simply an extension of that same strength.

By understanding your finances, organizing your records, and getting sound legal advice early, you’ll be in the best position to move forward with confidence — whatever the next chapter brings.

If you’re a military spouse in North Carolina and considering separation, I can help you understand your rights, plan your next steps, and protect your financial future.

You don’t have to navigate this alone — reach out to schedule a consultation today.